by We all want to have a great relationship. It is very distressing when you figured out that a person you wanted to be for life is a narcissist or psychopath. It is shocking and heartbreaking as what you believed is far away from the truth.
A narcissist doesn’t act like a typical human being. When they want to get what they want they use mind games all the time. Those games are like invisible tornados you have no idea you are in.
Why do they use those games in the first place? Well, they want you to lose whatever is unique about you. They want you to lose your entire self and your dignity. There is no place for respect and self- independence. They want you to give up on yourself and go under their clutches and be what they tell you to be.
Those mind games are taking away your natural self, they confuse you to take their beliefs and lies as your own. They want you to become a fully controlled puppet that does anything they want. It is called mental slavery.
#Mind Game No 1 ‘YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO TRUST ME’
At the beginning of a relationship, they act very friendly, trustworthy and supportive. They are into this person and they are very interested in a person’s life, feelings, fears, and concerns. They can play a victim to believe that he is your soul mate.
Unfortunately, narcissists love to know victim’s weaknesses. They know that everyone has some vulnerabilities. They need to know it to manipulate a victim. In other words, they collect data about you. It is called narcissistic supply. The sad news is that they really don’t care what you think or feel. If you end up feeling hurt and angry they are happy and satisfied. They know that you are sucked in.
They just say ” well, that is your problem that you are sad. Anyway, it is all your fault!”.
Remember that narcissists never take responsibility for themselves and their actions. They are extremely defensive and they put on you all their guilt.
All games are invisible. Narcissists are simply cowards and never say what they are planning.
You never hear from them: ‘Hi Jane! Can you tell me everything about yourself as I’m taking notes? I am planning how to use it against you later on. You won’t be as superior and perfect as I am’
After you got hooked and believed how pleasant and friendly they are, they criticize you.
You will notice a certain criticism such as ‘ why did you do this way?’, ‘I don’t think you should have said it this way’. ‘NO! No! No! You are wrong! I can do that better than you’. ‘You should do this like me as I am always right!’ etc.
They want to let you know that they look at life a whole lot better than the average person out there. You have no other option but to trust and listen to them.
#Mind Game No 2 ‘FEAR INSTALLMENT’
The true narcissistic nature is that they love when you fear them. It is their way to power and control you through fear. One day you may be ready to say the truth about them. They are going to get mad to fear you even more. Through fear, they groom you to be obedient and dependent on them. They know that people are afraid of emotion of fear. That is why they use it until you give up and surrender to them completely.
This mind game force victims to forget about their uniqueness. They stop expressing their true feelings and opinions. They do anything to avoid punishment.
# Mind Game No 3 ‘ISOLATION’
After they learn about you and your vulnerabilities they start to isolate you. The plan is to fully control you. This helps them to keep a superior position. You are isolated from other people. They want you to lose strong allies and supporters as well.
Many times these people will talk about you without you even realizing. Someone can love your work. The narcissist hates when you succeed. He will expose your dark secrets and flaws to others in a minute to destroy your work and suppress your talents.. He will do everything to keep people from having too much of strong confidence in you.
It makes other people sabotage their relationships with you. Over time they start to disappear from your life. You will become completely isolated and fully dependent on your perpetrator.
#Mind Game No 4 ‘FLAWS’
Narcissists love exposing your personal flaws and hold it against you. In the beginning, you got sucked in trusting me mentality game. You told him your secrets, flaws, and mistakes you did years ago. Now, any time they want to score some points, they will recall your flaws. They want to diminish your worth and hurt you.
Whatever good you achieved in life will be bashed by him. Remember, narcissist hates seeing people happy, fulfilled and successful. They just collect data about their victims. Any time they get exposed of doing something wrong they use this mind game. They will focus on your negative repercussions from the past. This helps to turn themselves into innocent victims.
#Mind game No 5 ‘BLAMELESS VICTIM’
A narcissist always blames other people. They play a victim role to show they have very good intentions. They never admit that they screwed it up. They always excuse themselves blaming other people who caused them to blow it. They must have somebody else they can pin their mistakes on.
#Mind game No 6 ‘RULES AND REGULATIONS’
When they talk to the victim they use imperative style ‘you must’, ‘you got to’ ‘you have to’. Narcissist perceives life as big regulatory. They expect others to fulfill their obligations even though they don’t want.
It is crucial to realize those tricks. You can fight with a narcissist but it is a pointless game as he will never stop his manipulations. What can you do in that situation? You are too precious to waste your life. Focus on yourself, face your fears, pains and concerns. Choose a better life for yourself without toxic people.
